The Babymakers review (DVD)

The Babymakers features a montage – not a scene, a montage – of a character getting hit in the crotch, supposedly one of the most painful things a man can endure. There’s a scene later on in the film of a female character giving birth, supposedly one of the most painful things a woman can endure. There are no scenes that feature anyone watching The Babymakers, a new contender for one of the most painful things to endure, male or female. And it's supposed to be a comedy.

As a director, Chandrasakhar has been involved in some acclaimed US TV comedy shows such as  Arrested Development and Community. As a member of the Broken Lizard comedy team, he has been responsible for less-acclaimed fare, with 2001’s Super Troopers and 2006’s Beerfest being perhaps best known. The Babymakers isn’t a Broken Lizard production, though Chandrasekhar is joined by fellow member Kevin Heffernan, who’s on tubby sidekick duty.

At dinner to celebrate their third anniversary, Tommy (Schneider) and Audrey (Munn) decide its time to take the next step in their relationship and have a baby, not anal sex as Tommy (hilariously) first thought. After discovering he’s now “firing blanks” due to the aforementioned crotch damage, Tommy luckily recalls he once donated his sperm to help pay for Audrey’s engagement ring – as you do – now he needs to get it back.

Deceptively dumb in appearance, history shows that a successful gross-out sex comedy needs to be skillfully and assuredly crafted. Scripted by the team behind Say it isn’t So, Black Night and Ice Age: Meltdown, The Babymakers is nothing more than a string of poorly judged, scatological set pieces, most of which are about sperm, culminating in, wait for it, someone slipping in a puddle of it, over and over again.

Wasting a talented cast featuring alumni from Parks and Recreation, Ben and Kate, even The Wire, The Babymakers is lazy in every way. Seemingly aspiring to fall somewhere between a Judd Apatow style, overgrown-yet-lovable man-child comedy and a Farrelly Brothers-esque, gross-out farce, The Babymakers achieves neither, not even close. Though, as previously mentioned, it does have a montage of someone getting hit in the crotch.

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Stuart O'Connor is the Managing Editor of Screenjabber, the movie review website he co-founded with Neil Davey far too many years ago. He likes all genres, as long as the film is good (although he does enjoy the occasional bad "guilty pleasure"), and drinks way too much coffee.

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